Normally the ongoing unpleasantness in Ferguson would have long since inspired an outraged polemic from me by now. It saddens me deeply. It’s not as if the world is waiting for my opinion, but I am ashamed to be silent beyond a couple of social media comments. I’m just dead in the water for some reason.
(The reason is no mystery to me. I’m in the throes of a depressive episode. I’ve never had a major episode that’s made it impossible for me to function. This is merely another one of those periods of emptiness and self-loathing that I seem to experience every three or four months. I take my meds and I try to keep moving and, eventually, something changes and I experience a sense of well-being for a while. Gosh, I am sure looking forward to when that part happens again. I daresay my kids and husband are as well, since Zombie Me is nowhere near as agreeable or high-functioning as non-Zombie Me.)
This post from Medium.com likens depression to malware bogging down a computer, and I have to say that’s the best metaphor for it that I’ve read in a while.